What’s the significance of “two minutes” in the title of your book?
That’s how long it should take you to assess whether you want to spend more time with this person you’re talking with or if you just want to put them on a Christmas card list and that will be the end of it.
 

Do you think there’s a basic rule of thumb to all networking?
My basic premise is that you should treat everyone as an old friend and ask as many open-ended questions as possible. If you do that, the world can be yours, no matter what type of networking you are trying to do – growing your business, forming new alliances, finding a job, and more. 

Why the focus on open-ended questions?
If you ask a yes or no question, there’s no opening to ask another. An open-ended question opens the door to the various things you can relate with the person with whom you’re speaking. Maybe you belong to the same group, or it could be something as simple as that you both got lost getting to wherever you are now. It’s the way to find levels of rapport so you can begin to build a relationship. 

What are the most common mistakes you see people do when trying to network?
They’re trying to sell, and networking is the complete opposite of selling. They’re always looking to hand out business cards even before they are asked. A good networking relationship is built on helping the other person and listening more than talking. I see a lot of people do the exact opposite, they’re all, “me, me, me.”  

You outline four basic steps in building networking relationships, what are they?
The first step is knowing who you want to meet – not just end-users but people who can serve as referrals as well. The second step is the “where” component – you need to network where your target market is whether that’s trade associations, golf outings or something else. The third is what to say – how to start a conversation. And the fourth is the magic in all this – how to grow and nurture that relationship. You have to stay in touch, otherwise, all you end up with is a bunch of business cards.

 Any creative examples of what you’ve done to keep the line of communication open?
I’ve sent a few tiny shoes with a note that says, “Great meeting you and to take the next step, I’ve enclosed a small shoe to get my foot in the door.” I also sent a thank you card with a phone card in it. The note says something like, “It was great speaking with you. I will be calling you and the call is on me.” I also always ask for two business cards – one for me and one to refer them to others. I also send out about two pieces of snail mail per day, I think it’s something that has not been used nearly enough. 

How does snail mail make a difference in networking?
Because it shows that you care. It takes more time and thought than sending off a quick e-mail or picking up the phone, and a card or physical note can serve as a great reminder. I send a lot of birthday cards, or newspaper stories that I think will interest people, or maybe it’s just a greeting card that says, “just keeping in touch.” And I send out my newsletter. 

You’re big on newsletters. Would a newsletter really work for everyone?
I think so because it’s an opt-in tool – people only receive it if they want to. Done correctly, it’s not a sales tool, it’s a way to grow, and it doesn’t have to be all about your professional life. You can share things like a great movie or a restaurant recommendation. You might have a newsletter for two different groups, one for friends and one for business, because friends commonly become business contacts. 

Anything people always avoid in networking that they shouldn’t?
Asking for help. A lot of people think it’s not okay to say, “listen, I’m growing my business and I need help with x, y, and z,” or “I’m in transition and I’m an expert in x. Do you know anyone hiring in the field of y?” The key is to ask in the third-person. That way, you’re not putting them on the spot, asking them in particular if they can find you a job or help grow your business. You’d be surprised at how often being honest and asking for help can work.
 

How would you define a successful networking experience?